Friday, February 15, 2008

Barbarella's Back

And She's Talkin' Dirty Politics
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--Editorial Staff
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Jane Fonda, long rumored to be the paramour of Rush Limbaugh--the 300-pound gorilla in any political room--let slip an unutterable utterance live, on the air, while appearing on NBC's Today yesterday…ah, the name of the show is Today, that is, and she was on it yesterday, which is not the name of the show. It just sets the timeline as not being today on Today, but, instead, yesterday when all her troubles seemed so far away. Well, Jane—if that’s, indeed, your real name—looks as though your troubles are here to stay after saying (if there are any children in the room, leave now), as the liberal media reported, “the c-word.”

Jane, 70, but not looking a day over 54, was promoting her new movie with co-star Sylvester Stallone, 75, Barbarella IV, the Rambo Years, when she mentioned that she would be appearing on stage with a lot of other famous old women in the long-running play, “The You Know What Dialogues.” But instead of saying "you know what," she chose to use “the c-word.” You know, the word that automatically got boys in trouble in middle school for saying it instead of, well, you know what.
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Fonda, who confirms BPNN's theory that Rush Limbaugh is not gay, was not publicly endorsing any presidential candidate—of which there are three, if you don’t count the kooks—but the septuagenarian actress--about the same age as McCain--who's never shied from controversy, has long been associated with political causes leaning toward the L-word persuasion (Liberal). So, we were surprised that it came as such a shock to yesterday’s Today host when Jane said, “I’m appearing in The C-Word Monologues!”
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This magazine wishes to take a stance. But in lieu of that, let us say that Ms. Fondue has shown courage and backbone—plus just a little cleavage and leg—by her willingness to use the C-word, instead of the more “Politically Correct” (in air quotes for emphasis) other word for, well, you know what. Therefore, the editorial staff—guys all—wish to say that from now on, it will be our policy to follow Jane’s lead in using the C-word. And with that we have reserved the second row seats for Jane’s opening night performance in “The Conservative Dialogues.” Limbaugh, reportedly, takes up the front row.
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Barbarella IV, the Rambo Years opens tomorrow at theaters everywhere and we'll be sure to get front row seats for that.
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Views expressed aren't necessarily those of the editorial staff and do not reflect actual research or command of the subject but are subject to change. Blog Party News Network (BPNN), all rights and seats reserved. ©

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