FaceBlog: Iowa

What a Long Strange Trippi It's Been

Remember this cool statement? “As far as the Internet, this is still the wagon trains coming across the prairie...Everyone is still a pioneer out there. Everything is learn by doing it.”* Joe Trippi--who rode herd on the Howard Dean Dream Scream Team to political Armageddon in the Iowa 2004 Caucus, and should not be confused with Joe Torre who is rumored to being considered as the new manager of the Rudy The G-Man Giuliani campaign 2008--predicted in April, 2007 that Iowans would embrace the promising technology of ox-drawn political metaphors, thus stampeding like so many dumb heifers in support of his man, Johnny I Wear Farmer Pants Edwards. What Trippi and many outsiders never grasp about Iowa is that the real 19th Century wagon trains may have moved on to the West Coast, but Iowa was settled by pioneers who, after crossing the Mississippi River and seeing all that prairie stretching to the horizon, looked around and said, "Screw it. This is far enough." They then held a Steak Fry (TM) and built a mighty tollgate to any future presidential hopefuls trying to cross the mid-continent bridge to the White House (TM) . **

Apparently, after some reflection, and the prospects of an old-fashioned Hawkeye butt-whoopin' come January, Trippi has conceded that: “Dude, it’s clearly true, you know, like, blogs and Web sites, and even some of the, like, cool stuff that our team is, you know, doing in like Iowa, has got less of an impact in Iowa.” ***

Well, Mr. Trippi, that ain't yellow matter custard dripping from this campaign dog's eye, it's, instead, Iowa ethanol-boosted pride that opposes forced high-tech impact on the low-tech state. Every candidate should memorize the Iowa state motto: "Ibbin nicht gotsum; nibbin nebus needsum" or: "If we don't got it, we don't need it."

***

* Actual quote: NY Times October 12, 2007 ©

** White House is a trademark property of Haliburton, used without permission.

***Actual quote (if you remove the "likes" "you know" and "Dude") © (Oct 12, 2007 NY Times)

Dateline Indianola, Iowa, Artie Azzetti, editor-on-the-lam, The Blog Party News Network (BPNN), ©, all rights revered.