Obama bid Biden?

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Warming up a packed audience of 70 for the opening of the newest IHOP (Iowa House Of Politics (TM)) in Iowa City, TT candidate, Joey Bidentime (D-DE), held the crowd for nearly two hours before FEC hostage negotiators arrived with a large matching-funds check, and the candidate agreed to stop talking provided fellow candidate, Obamalamadama, would coach him on the art of getting to the point. The Obamalamadama camp is reported to have issued a terse reply to our request for a meeting between the two TT candidates, saying, "Biden who?" and bid him good luck in his campaign. The Obamalamadama POS (Person Of Spokes) then bid us a "good day," after asking how we got their number. Knowing we were dealing with attorneys, our staff researcher claimed First Amendment immunity, pretended to speak only Spanish and quickly hung up.

Meanwhile, as the crowd swelled to 30 or so, including 23 reporters attracted by IHOP's open bar, Bidentime fielded a question from Des Moines Register-Picayune politics-in-entertainment editor, David Yupson: "What, if anything, is your strategy for getting elected president or, failing that, at least for getting your campaign troops out of Iowa?"

Bidentime appeared to be caught off guard and paused before admitting: “I must admit to you that I’ve thought more about what I would do as president than how to get elected as president.”* You could hear the italics in his voice.
Yupson followed up with: "Will you ever shut up?"
Bidentime, confused, shifted to the third person as he seemed to escape, ghostlike, from his own candidacy: “Yes, that’s the thing Biden has to get over. I’m conscious of it. I don’t always meet it, but I’m working on it.” *
The ghost then warned Iowans that they would be visited by three more Bidentime images, each more mercurial than the previous, but, by then, the crowd had dispersed because the bar had closed.

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Dateline: Iowa City, Idaho, Artie Azzetti, editor-on-the-lam, The Blog Party News ©, all rights researched.

* Actual quotes. See NY Times Saturday, July 7, 2007
IHOP--Iowa House Of Politics (TM) -- is a trademark protected parody not associated with the International House of Pancakes, which in our editorial, First Amendment opinion, is about the silliest name possible for an eatery. --the editor